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Tuesday, August 29th, 2006
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So, after last night's impromptu "Don't Fear the Reaper" cow-bell performance while I was working I have come to the following two conclusions:
* People love retards (Netted $45 in tips between two tabs totaling $35)
* I'm going to be rich!
Also, since I signed up for myspace I have come to another conclusion. This conclusion is that at any given moment there is a person on the earth thinking, "Where's Keith?" Yes, I am Poochie The Rockin' Dog.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, July 26th, 2006
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Okay, since I haven't updated my lj this month, I'm just going to update in the form of a bulleted list.
- Moved into my new apartment. It has a guest bedroom with a half bath. VISIT ME!
- Went to the lamest July 4th party ever on a private beach. Ended up in a millionaire's wine cellar.
- Went to Summerfest in Milwaukee and saw Foreigner. It was AWESOME! I pumped my fist in that "rocking out" way and demanded of myself that I never stop. I thought they were going to play for 45 minutes. They played for a little over 2 hours. My friend Scott and I ended up right in front of the stage for "I Want to Know What Love Is" and had a decidedly gay moment. My arms were limp and useless because of the rock.
- Went to Cedar Point for 2 days. Stayed in a cabin. Drank. Fell through a deck while being chased by a naked man. The preceding statement resulted in my knee still being all fucked up. Ran around the cabin complex pretending to be a raptor. Katy, a co-worker, puked about 12 times at Cedar Point. It was awesome.
- Finally started showing Le Strat to my Chicago friends. The reception has been warm.
- Discovered that when I get drunk I have a problem keeping my shirt on.
- Hugged a homeless man outside of the Green Mill.
- Overdrafted by $350.
- Finally realized that I am a gloriously hot man.
- Signed up for classes at Improv Olympics.
- Started a movie project called "Last Call."
- Slept at my apartment maybe 5 times. I live very far away from everyone I know, and a couch seems more inviting than a $25 cab ride.
- Had my credit card company flip out because Erin is using my card in Ecuador. Apparently I don't have the spending profile of someone who would goto Ecuador.
- Have finalized plans to see Journey and Def Leopard in September.
- I lost my funny, but then got it back.
- Have had a great July with my good friend Gin.
- Made a ridiculous bulleted list on Livejournal
- Made a myspace page for my alter-ego Randy. Randall Snake Cranston
- BECAME KARAOKE!
I'm sure there's more, but fuck it.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Check it. The Power Rangers had a show in Chicago and they came into Trader Todd's (where I work).
Also check it. I almost quit yesterday and walked off. Todd is a dick.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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( Some random pictures from work )
The following few images are what I looked like for a week earlier this month. I was rocking a mustache and a mullet. I also called myself Randy Cranston and talked with a gruff voice. I scared my co-workers.
( Without this hair... I am a pussy )
Unfortunately, the phone I took the bulk of my pictures on was lost with all pictures aboard (otherwise there'd be a ton more).
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Hey, just so everyone knows, I am not updating or communicating regularly because I am currently renting out an apartment in the 11th (Dante was fucking wrong) circle of hell... The Hell of Eternal Work.
That being said... Dr. McNinja is amazing. If The Game Geek's Retro Review segment had been in a comic format, we would be internet celebrities.
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Thursday, June 15th, 2006
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So, I just got back to my apartment after 5 days in and around Carson City, NV. Erin and I stayed at this awesome hotel called The Gold Hill Hotel. We ended up there last summer and had a pretty terrifying ghost experience... so naturally we went back and stayed 2 nights.
The point of this post is that I am currently listening to the audio recordings we made each night (while we slept, because we are apparently big wusses), and listening to all the shit we slept through is creeping me out. It's basically 4 out of 7 hours of creaky footsteps, random thumps, knocking sounds, and other assorted terror. Oh yeah, and the noise of someone breathing into the mic that was suspended from the ceiling. Oh, and the bed shaking. (we were actually awake for some of this)
Oh, and before we even started recording we heard disembodied footsteps outside.
Oh, and a full 7 hours of snoring and weird sleep whimpers.
If you want to crap your pants, stay in room 4 or 5 of the Gold Hill Hotel. (5 was by far way more hauntedier)
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So, I drove home from Ann Arbor today (Erin has gradumanated)... and all was going well for getting to an appointment I had, until I ran into the Immigration protest (apparently one of the largest in the nation). While I will gladly suffer through the inconvenience caused by this rally, it still sucks that those in support of their cause have to deal with their rally fallout. Makes you want to knock some heads together so there are no more reasons to have rallys.
In positive news, while I was stuck in traffic for an hour a cab driver shouted some racial epithets at the protesters (keep reading! That wasn't what was positive!), then 2 members of the CPD walked up to his cab and wrote him a ticket (for what I'm assuming was public indecency). And there was much rejoicing... I'm serious. Everone cheered! For great justice!
Also, Knee Deep in Doom and Powerglove make my daily commute tolerable.
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What follows is a one-sided exchange I had with a group of ghetto-blaster kids on my way back from the Red Line stop today:
--Begin--
GBK 1: Haha! How's it going Ashton?!
GBK Group: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
GBK 1 to GBK 2: *High-Five*
--End--
Were we all so lame when we were in High School? I THINK they tried to insult me by insinuating that I looked like Ashton Kutcher. Last I checked, when you insult someone you're trying to compare them to someone whom is either irrevocably stupid or ugly. Chalk up another one for the failure of the American Education System.
...
Also, they felt that was high-five worthy.
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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So, if you like conspiracy shit check Loose Change out. Fuckin' a there is no way to refute some of what is said!
Also, I finally have the night off (but I've made a considerable amount of money over the past 7 days)!
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, April 5th, 2006
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Thursday, February 23rd, 2006
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Soooo, one of my ferrets (Pukk) has developed a rather large bald spot on her head, a balding tail, and has lost a ton of weight. All signs point to her having adrenal disease.
I'll hopefully be taking her to the vet this weekend.
:'(
:'(
:'(
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, February 14th, 2006
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So, last night I found out that one of the "regulars" at the bar where I do karaoke/work is none other than Greg Hollimon (a.k.a. Principle Onyx Blackman from Strangers with Candy)! C'mon!
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Comments: Read 8 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, February 10th, 2006
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So, I went to see a show tonight at Buddy Guy's Legends bar in downtown Chicago. I was invited by a performer that lives in my apartment building by the name of Tommy McCracken. If you're like me, you know next to nothing about jazz/blues. Regardless, it is kinda weird that I live in an apartment building with someone who is "kind of a big deal."
Also, I finished "Black Bodies and Quantum Cats" and have started in on "Elegant Universe." Fuck you quantum mechanics. I blow my mind at least once a day. Although, if you're interested in the subject of quantum mechanics and string theory I would definately recommend EU!
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, February 8th, 2006
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I haven't updated in a while. Due to cost cutting measures, I will be updating this in a bulleted list (I know! How weird for me to do this!!!!!!!).
- Started at Columbia College of Chicago. I'm liking it quite a lot. My "Aesthetics of Cinema" teacher is fucking crazy.
- The Keith Hand Curse of MP3 Players continues. I successfully lost another MP3 player within a month of having it.
- My hair is becoming curly
- I made a "Fallout" based theme for my PDA. Obsessed? Me? NAH!
- ... I thought I had something else. Guess not!
You see that? I used SQUARE bullet points. That's classy!
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, January 21st, 2006
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Friday, January 20th, 2006
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Thursday, January 19th, 2006
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Okay, so two days ago someone two doors down from me died from Diabetes. This initially disturbed me because... well... someone died. But I also got nervous about the fact that by living alone it could be days before people realize I might have died!
Also, the police knocked on my door and shouted, "POLICE!!" They almost gave me a heart attack. Then they proceeded to leave all their fucking garbage throughout the apartment building (used gloves, box of some sort, about a million coffee cups, and other assorted junk).
Bastages!
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, January 16th, 2006
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This is just a quick update. I'm all but certain I have the job at Trader Todd's. All I have to do is meet with the owners for final sign off... which I think means I get to meet Ogre.
Also, I think I burned out on WoW again.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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kevil's journal
sad.